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#2619 “Suburban Senshi's Ten Days of Christmas Day 8! Offensive edition!!”
@spritflame
LINE chat excerpt starts - 22 December 2025 6:18AM
[gTV]C'est_la_V
6:18 AM
Hi Hi Minna-san!! Since we have far too many friends to by gifts for, we decided to just make a random gift pool! But the rules are different this year!!
10 people got chosen at random to get a gift for another person, with the maximum budget at 2500 yen!! But to make it spicy, they don't know what the gift is, or who it's for!
The advanced Tomoe Research Labs AI selected a "keyword" for each gift and assigned it to someone at random, who won't know they're getting it until the day of! Over the next ten days we'll show what we got, and the giver will have to try and explain how the word the AI chose relates to the gift!!
@spritflame
6:18 AM
today Paisley was the buyer
Edgeworth was the recipient
the keyword the ai chose was prison
Miles Edgeworth
6:19 AM
...
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:20 AM
Oh Miles, if only you hadn't decided Wright was your one and only you could have had my heart in prison.
Miles Edgeworth
6:20 AM
...
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:21 AM
But since you made the incorrect choice you'll need to settle for this, instead:
Miles Edgeworth
6:21 AM
Thanks... I think? What is it?
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:21 AM
I don't actually know....
Det. Ema Skye
6:22 AM
It's a Funko (which makes it a piece of crap) of Dumbledore from Harry Potter (which makes it a piece of crap squared)
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:23 AM
...Oh, Disgusting! I'm sorry Miles ><
Miles Edgeworth
6:23 AM
That's fine, I mean it was chosen at random...
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:23 AM
Yes but now the proceedings feel befouled
// J_Daito //
6:25 AM
Well if it helps any, imagine that someone lights all those candles stuck close to his beard. They'll light him up like a Christmas Candle.
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:25 AM
...so that's how Alan Rickman got him.
Silicon Momoko
6:26 AM
I'm imagining him running around on fire like a Roman Candle, waving his hands around screaming "Harry! Harry!" and flailing before melting into a pile of goo
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:27 AM
God Rowling could have had one of the most beloved children's franchises of all time except she chose to use the money from it to actively fund hate against people for nothing more than them wanting to exist.
It makes art vs. artist separation impossible because the art is actively being used to fund hatred.
Miles Edgeworth
6:28 AM
...Do you mind if I just throw this one out, Miss Peinforte?
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:29 AM
Be my guest. I encourage you to do it in the most dramatic fashion possible.
Miles Edgeworth
6:30 AM
* Miles Edgeworth thinks of something completely undignified *
@Paisley Pythia Peinforte
6:31 AM
Oh, Miles, come now you have to share. It's Christmas.
Miles Edgeworth
6:32 AM
Let's just say it involves a flamethrower, and a melted mass of PVC slag being flung at the doorstep of Damon Gant with extreme prejudice.
@spritflame
LINE Chat excerpt ends - 22 December 2025 6:32AM
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Suburban Senshi: Superman ain't got s[BLEEP]t on us.